How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
