i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
