so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
