Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize