he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
