I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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