just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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