Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
she smelled like a LAN party
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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