is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
did you just send me my own nude
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
