I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
one two three fourrrrnication!
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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