sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
