But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
