Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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