Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
