so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
