He is an equal opportunity slut.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
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