I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You are a genius and a whore.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
