They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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