we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
