i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
