Your tits are I can't wait for
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
