This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
