their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
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