So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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