So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
