saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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