I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Do vagina's smell?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
