i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize