Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
