i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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