yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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