Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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