yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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