I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
