I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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