every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
