I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
