Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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