so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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