I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize