he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Did I show you my penis last night?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
