I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
