hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
