Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
