I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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