do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
