its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
My ass is underappreciated
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
