so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
We talked him into tasing himself.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize