You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Randomize
