4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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